Circles . . .

See that little girl over to the right? What DID happen to her? I look in the mirror at the person reflected there and ask, "Where is she?" Many, many answers . . . but no solutions to the BIG question . . . where is she going? Some days I think I know. Other days not so much. It "ain't" easy livin' alone with only yourself and two cats to keep you going. In fact, it's actually hard work. Some mornings you swing your feet out of bed with high hopes, but as the day goes on you count the number of times you've said, "okay, now what should I do, where should I go, etc.". Sometimes it feels okay to just sit, but not if you're a person who has an inherent need to accomplish something. The unanswered question always remains . . . accomplish WHAT? You know there has to be more than keeping your space clean and maintained, more than the job that allows you to do more than just pay the bills, eat right, and be able to do a few extra things, more than playing on the computer . . . what is it then?


EUREKA! It's a proven fact that those who live alone and spend too much TIME alone, die much sooner. But merely going out in public and just being AROUND people is not enough. A human being needs a 'circle of friends' you feel free to call anytime, those with whom you can spill the beans to and not feel chastised, and those who feel free to stop at your place anytime. I have those kinds of friends, but they live far away. Did I just tell myself I need to move? That probably isn't the answer. "Wherever I go, there I am" has more meaning than the words reveal.

No, I don't know who this group is, but they're family, they're connected, and each of them has several friends. Imagine how huge the portrait would be by adding the friends! I don't have a lot of family left. At least not that I know of. And yes, I said in my last post that I had become "ingrained" in my current town. But it's still not complete. I don't know that any place would be. 


But I do know that all of the trials and tribs I've put myself through have strengthened me, and I'm not a bad person to hang out with. :-) I just need to make the first move . . .